We told everyone you are leaving because of illness. The truth is I’m sick of you.
I’ve got good news for you. You won’t have to worry about being late for work ever again.
Tell me – how long have you been with us not counting tomorrow?
What did Monica Lewinsky say when she got fired? I had a good job and I blew it.
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
- An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.
- Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.
- Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much. Then again, don’t drink too little.
- Time is never wasted when you’re wasted all the time.
- I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they always worked for me.
- I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.
Money is good:
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons - Woody Allen
Money is easy come easy go:
I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered - George Best – Footballer
There’s never enough:
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something - Jackie Mason
The State takes it all anyway:
I love to go to Washington, if only to be nearer my money - Bob Hope
How To Spot A “Good” Woman – 15 Things To Look For – link
Speech is just 25% of communication. Body language, facial expression, tone, and attitude account for a greatly in a conversation.
View the slideshow.
Srinivas Rao has a different approach to using Twitter, and claims that all you need is 150 followers. Go here to read this confounding post:
Why 150 Followers Is All You Really Need
The best of times is now. – Oprah Winfrey
Don’t expect anything from anyone. Accept compliments and gifts with grace, enjoy the time you’re able to spend with people, be a good and loyal friend and lover, never break your word, and don’t expect anyone to return the favor.